margate/dreamland script

The sound of a train station announcement. People take their seats. The stage is dark. The lights flash like passing trains.

St Pancras International
Stratford International
Ebbsfleet International
Gravesend
Strood
Maidstone West
Rochester
Chatham
Gillingham 
Rainham 
Sittingbourne
Faversham
Change at Faversham for
Whitstable
Herne Bay
Birchington on sea
Broadstairs and
Margate

St. Pancras International
London Blackfriars
Elephant and Castle
Bromley South
St Mary Cray
Swanley
Otford
Borough Green and Wrotham
West Malling (for Kings Hill)
East Malling
Barming
Maidstone East
Bearsted (for Leeds Castle)
Hollingborne
Harrietsham
Lenham
Charing
Ashford International
Canterbury West
Ramsgate and
Margate

London Victoria
Bromley South
Rochester
Chatham
Gillingham (Kent)
Newington
Sittingbourne
Teynham
Faversham
Whitstable
Chestfield and Swalecliffe
Herne Bay
Birchington on Sea
Westgate on Sea and
Margate

When clearance is given there is a ‘bing-bong’ and the audio continues until the last announcement of “Margate.” 
Louise enters through the audience and arrives at the microphone as the audio finishes. She is carrying bags. The kind you take to the beach. As she puts them down we hear the sound of a train door slamming. The lights come up. The video syncs with this and snaps up the image of the sky. Blue sky.
She looks at the audience
She talks into the mic with silent background.

Louise : What can you see ?

She opens the book on the mic stand in front of her and reads the text that she seems not to have seen before.

concrete
sand
streets
houses
shops
cars
lorries
flags

she turns the page

rain
sun
wind
offices
lightning out to sea

seagulls
rock pools
crabs
lifeguards
cafes

AK/DK very gradually start to play tones

bars
with seats outside
people smoking and drinking

chalk graffiti
seaweed
footprints in the sand

the tidal pools
the wind brakes
the street lights
the dog shit
the rubbish
the broken glass
shelters

shop keepers
shop workers
bankers
barmaids
bunting
people pushing prams

the resdients of the homes
a simple beat underpins the rhythm of the text.
of the houses
of the hostels
of the flats
of the bedsits

the hairdressrs
the carpenters
the chefs
the cooks
the washer uppers
the sea cadets

the rhythm builds

the new hotels
the old hotels
the bnbs
the theatre

the vintage shops
the coffee shops
the pound shops
the restaurants
the take aways
the lifeboat

the librarians
the historians
the DJs
the experts
the interested
the disinterested
the stressed
the tagged
the artists

the football kickers
the swimmers
the bathers
the sunbathers
the bowlers
the skateboarders
the runners
the walkers
the cyclists
the dog walkers

the kids
the students
the babies
the birds

the carers
the cleaners
the sick and the grieving
the rich and the poor.
the old and the young.  

the tories
the greens
the ukips
the socialists
the satirists
the indignant
the cant be arsed
the tired of it all
the trying to make a difference
the what’s the fucking point
the disappointed
the abandoned
the angry
the fighters
the fallen
the confused
the patient persisters
the optimistic
the pig ignorant
the violent
the shouters
the merry, the drunk and the shitfaced.

the bookies
the court house
the casino
the corner shops
the schools
the supermarkets
the souvenirs
the job centre
the polish shop
the pet shop
the garage
the offies
the food bank
the cockle stall
the park
the pool room
the florists

the police station
the undertakers

the clubs
the cubs
the churches
the chapel
the mosque
the synagogue
the salvation army

The Lord Byron
The Wig and Pen
The Rose in June
The Belle View
The Britannia

the metal detectors
the shell collectors
the rubbish pickers
the mini golf

The divorced
The married
The single
The separated
The widowed
The newly weds
The lonely
The loved up
The children
The cheaters
The cohabitees

The people

the people on their holidays
the day trippers
the people who work here
the people who were born here
the people who have moved here
the people who were sent here
the people who have come from far away
All the people Down From London

the people who can’t wait to get out
the people who left and came back
the people who don’t have long left
the people just starting out
the people who have always lived here
and always will

the winter gardens
the shell grotto
the tudor house
the harbour
the hospital
the high street
the old town
the dirty concrete block of flats looking out over it all

the arcades
the beaches
the beach huts
the chalk cliffs
the horses riding in the sea

the new steps
the gallery
the things washed up on the tide
the wind farms
the boats out to sea

the sunsets

the sky

dreamland

The sound of seagulls
The lights turn warm and hit Nigel as he enters.
He is wearing swimming trunks.
He is covered in sand and seaweed and suntan lotion.
He speaks in a falsetto voice and has voice distortion on his mic.

The sound of the sea and gulls.

Nigel :

I AM THE TOWN

THE SUN RISES 

LIGHTING my FACE EVERY MORNING

AND SETS BEHIND my EYES

my BELLY RUMBLES

my SHOES AND SOCKS ARE FULL OF SAND

the SEA LAPS AT my TOES

YOU ARE in me

WALKING my STREETS

UNDER my SHELTERS

MOORED TO my HARBOUR

RUNNING THROUGH my VEINS

my ROADS ARE FULL

THEY ARE EMPTY

my BUILDINGS ARE FULL

THEY ARE EMPTY

My WATERS ARE FULL

THEY ARE EMPTY

my CHALK FACE CRUMBLES

THE SEASONS PASS

(THE YEARS PASS)

STAY WITH ME

The sound of traffic

He turns his head to the side like a curious dog, but slower

It’s a bit magical, ethereal, not human

Silence.

He looks into the audience and observes us.


You are on my beach.

You’re on my beach

She is sweating

He squints

They are digging a hole with a spoon

He takes of his shirt

Her KitKat is melting

She is carrying too many bags

He lifts his head and notices he is alone

The gulls feathers ruffle in the breeze

‘Fuck off’

He opens a window

She stops half way up the steps and looks back at the boats in the distance - catches her breath

He waits in the car outside Morrisons

the summertime music starts softly

You are hungry  

You fancy a toastie

They take their pints outside

The dog rolls a pebble round its teeth

Oi !  

They are fucking about

You step off the pavement but a car is coming  - step back

Ketchup runs down her arm to her elbow

The weird baby laughs 

You laugh

His flip flops slap his heels

She scrapes the hangers along the rail, looking for her size

He has trod in dogshit

Her till gets stuck

He turns the telly over

She is texting and doesn’t notice her friend walking towards her

They see a nice chair in the window

The two p’s clatter onto the next level

He tuts -

He can’t find the stapler

They have caught nothing all day

She signs in three places  

Here, here and here

the music has beats

He is standing on the balcony rolling a fag  

She’s been queueing for ever

He spits over the balcony

She’s trapped her coat in the door of the bus

His horse is a fucking donkey

He can’t find his pigging wrench

He helps her drink her tea

They are standing at the front door looking sheepish

Ding-dong

He searches his pockets for the right change - finds a shell

She looks at the clock, wants to go home

They write their names in chalk on the promenade

He blows the sand off his glasses

She is shivering


You sit very still

You look at the sea and the sky

You breathe out

You feel better


It is summer 

Hope is coming

Dreamland is back

Nigel and Louise look at each other. They turn over the next page of the script together. They start talking together but from then on neither has been allocated lines. They take the lines randomly, sometimes overlapping, sometimes together, sometimes alternating, sometimes taking a whole chunk, sometimes splitting it up. The music is improvised.

Margate girls sucking too much cock

Margate girls are too fucking much to handle

Can Rashad go a day without complaining about females ?!

I used to talk to this girl from East Kent College
Worst mistake - that girl was too clingy for me

I get emotional when I really like someone 
Is that normal ?

I hate how life changes 
Last year was the best year
Those were better days where everyone was happy

Bitch I don't wanna watch Netflix. I want to FUCK

Somebody keeps stealing my socks and I know it's my gran, cause she keeps talking about how many I got  
SEE MY PROBLEM

I swear every time this girl speaks I want to punch her in the throat

When I'm home alone
Loud music /Porn with volume up. Screaming loud

I'll rather wake up get stoned and then go to work
YOU can stick with the ‘wake up, go to work and pay your bills’
Where is your life at ?
I just wanna enjoy life

Ladies… THIS is how you arch it

Nobody going to take her place
You can give a girl everything and you'll still get treated wrong
You ever wanted to feel absolutely nothing?

A girl who don't suck cock is just a waste

Today is so fucking beautiful

This is Margate now – sunny- warm
Hashtag Not Raining
Hashtag No excuses
Come on down

Gotta love having the beach as your back garden!!
Hashtag ‪beach ‪hashtag peaceful hashtag ‪reading

Bit tiddlywinks but that's okay cos I don't have work tomorrow.
Or the next day.
Or the next day.
Or the next day.
Or the next month

Asked Hubbie to trim my bush in the front garden.
It's like I've asked him to scale the north face of Mount Kilimanjaro‪
Hashtag drama

Day 4 of the school holidays.
I no longer know what day of the week it is and I’m crying silent tears of pure gin.

Can anyone attend the funeral of a 95 yr old WW2 fighter pilot tomorrow ?
The undertaker is worried it'll just be him

Still a lot of empty shops in Margate...

“Hi ! Its me !
Can you buzz me in ?”

One whole year ciggy free
Days without smoking 365
Cigarettes not smoked  5475
Money saved 2161 pounds
Time saved 22 days

So proud of my handsome man ‪@Roland92 who's only gone and got himself a full time job

Today we're doing a Chas & Dave and going dahhhn to Margate

Beach blanket?
Check!
Book?
Check!
Factor 50?
Check!
Excited small person?
Check!
Looking forward to seeing you today Margate

Sitting here minding my own business, then I hear the ice cream van -
SUMMER IS HERE

Either my shorts have gotten smaller or my arse has gotten bigger...

I love the summer round here 
You get the hot weather 
You can go on the beaches, you k
You’ve got the…there’s lots of people down there  
…everywhere open a bit later, you know...    
The colours.
Because of the sea front and everything else    
It’s the atmosphere in the summer is good 
It IS good

I’m sweating like a paedo in a playground

That's my Jackie down on the beach in Margate.
And she's as cool as Margate is,
and she's lived here all her life.

Behold the summer.
Lobster coloured gents in speedos, running away from wasps

Don’t get your shoes wet !!!
What did I tell you !

Having to wear tights to work in August !
That’s all I’m going to say

On days like this, who needs Spain when you have Margate!

Get those drinks in the fridge guys.

I want to go home
What ?
I want to go home
You want to go home ?
Of course not. - I'm JOKING

Margate, England
Who are you trying to kid ?!
Hashtag deprivation-chic
Hashtag shithole

I love se summertime.  Since se endo de may to end of te August.  Cos se sunshine - when de sunshi - nice weder - peoples come on de seaside.
Me ? I never go te time to go on de bitch.  I work here  I see the bitch  see se people there    go on the bitch  some o dem ze they…undress (laugh)   run in you know (laughs)
The reason we don’t use at dat beech  not to svim  -  it’s not cleen

No.
Increased credit card use NOT due to shift to cashless society.
It's cos people don't have any fucking money

I wouldn't mind having to hear people's karaoke at this time of night if it didn't sound like a cat getting fisted

Bright and sunny day in ‪Margate today!!
Just like every day!!!
Except literally not at all.
Hashtag Good Old British Summer

Morning all – how does Thursday find you?
It’s proper dreary in Margate today
…c’mon summer ! you can do better...!

Hey ! are they grey clouds?    I’ve got my shorts on!!

For fucks sake the one day I don't wear a coat to work at it rains

I JUST CUT MY ELBOW. SOMEONE PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE

Why do children enjoy screaming?
Shut the fuck up !

People moaning about Margate need to cheer up,
Yeah it comes with some shit...
Just like every other town in England
--my point is that if you moan there's an issue,
you're Gunna have a shit time,
It's an experience my friend,   
I'll see you there

Travelling on late running 16.57 Stratford to Margate.
Jam packed, standing all down the aisles, boiling hot, no air conditioning  
I CANNOT WAIT to get home

Checkout Operator (14Hrs) required in Ramsgate –

Shop Floor Assistant (13hrs a week) required in Ramsgate
- a different one

Customer Restaurant Assistant (18hrs) required in Sainsburys

Margate FC
1-nil !
COME ON THE GATE !

Come on you ‪blues !
Hashtag properfootball
Hashtag loveit

Yay !!
2-nil !!!
And I'm stood chatting to Basingstoke kit lady
She is NOT happy

3- nil !!
Fabulous football
COME ON!!!

Blimey. Piers Morgan’s hair

General Assistant. Christchurch College, Broadstairs.
Part Time
‪#GetBritainWorking

Stockroom Asst. Westwood Cross.
Part time

Sales Adviser – Dixons, Ramsgate
Part Time Temporary.

Bar Staff
Part time
J D Wetherspoon - Margate

Primark Westwood Cross, Retail Assistants 
Flexible hours

Waiting Staff
Flexible hours
Sands Hotel Margate

Customer Service Asst
Full Time Permanant
William Hill
‪#GetBritainWorking

One more week till payday, I can do this!

as if on the phone
Yes- she’s right here... Do you want to say hello?
gestures no
Okay, I'll just pass you over...
NOOOOOOOO !!!!!!

I love you Bars and Melody you are my life you are all I talk about

I love you Bars and Melody so much 
you are my world

What a lovely evening for a stroll at sunny Margate 


Margate Sunset on a summers evening.
Hashtag  Just what the doctor ordered

Great News!....
Government announce £250,000 Margate tourism grant 

Wonder whose pocket that will go in

The night before results day kind of feels like Christmas eve -
except I feel like hell is coming

Are you popping into my Bingo on Margate Seafront today ?
The kettle is on and sandwiches made fresh

I went to Margate. I saw Ian Beal in Bermuda shorts.
I saw a granny sneezing Lilt up a wall.
I got a tattoo.

I Cannot wait for wedding season to be over!!!

Alright then mate have a good weekend
Bye
Bye

Summer will be over soon, the kids will go back to school, it'll get colder and -honestly I cannot wait :) !!

Okay rainy day, you are making me realise that a day off Is finally in sight …

There’s a bit of autumn in the air this morning don’t you think ?

Blimey where did my summer holibob go !!!
Back to school on Monday

This beautiful town.

This beautiful town.

I love you too babydoll

music subsides 
lights dim
The sound of rain
The background video fades into a cloudy dark sky
Louise gets jeans, a shirt and jumper out of her bag and gives them to Nigel. Nigel dresses.

Louise :
the pier fell into the sea
the lido washed away
the sun deck was pulled down
the hotels are now flats
the airport is a lorry park
the high street’s full of empty shops
the golden mile is dark at night
the donkeys are gone

But…
dreamland is back

Nigel and louise look at each other. Louise starts to put on her jumper. They are wearing the same clothes.
The new music starts slowly

Nigel :

Hope is coming
Hope is coming
Dreamland is back

The rain stops
Autumn slows down and is more relaxed

What happened to the summer ?

Oh Margate, you shithole, I have missed you

It’s so weird wearing shoes and socks again 
My feet feel enormous

Our teachers have been in during the holidays,
preparing their classes for the new year.
- it’s looking great !

Someone please give me an update on the transfer window.
I’ve been away for the summer and I've managed to miss everything

My mums come with me for my first day at college
She’s made me sandwiches
Hashtag Please don’t let anyone see her

Even though deep down we knew summer was over, it was still sad to see the chaps packing up the rides on the beach this morning

Not sure what I’m supposed to do now the summers gone
#Seasonal work
#it’s hard

I have never seen ‪Manston covered in so many Vapour Trails.
I so miss this place buzzing with planes and with people

These mornings are starting to feel fucking cold

Living in a bungalow is so shit because you can hear everythingggggg
Why has my grandad decided to start cooking now?!

Sunday morning swim in the sea
Cold and crisp, just the way I like it

I’ve always felt that autumn and spring are just buffer zones between summer and winter - Like … We’re all just waiting.
We’re just treading water ‘til the main events

Doing an essay on a book you haven't read is actually kind of hard.....
I’m not sure college and me are going to get on

Crikey it's chilly!
Is it wrong to consider a hot water bottle in September ?
I'll answer that
YES Britain, yes it is.

Margate   England
Not so much the stuff of dreams today
It’s closed and it’s raining

All my jumpers have been eaten by moths 
Not again !

They keep telling me – go !
You'll meet people.
Ye-ah people over 50
I was the youngest person there
By about twenty years

I wish the weather would make up its mind

I keep thinking its Friday and its only Wednesday

Part Time Cleaner wanted Margate
Nights

The ocean and the leaves are both turning pink tonight

Yeah
The sunsets have gone bonkers this week
The sky is on fire

I live in Margate but my estate’s quiet, so I hate it when the nights draw in and I’m walking home in the dark

I just want to lay in a pile of warm laundry and eat bread

Them girls who are 15 going on 25 drinking wine with their mum after a long day at school. LOL

I am from the Margate area and was wondering if you would be interested in meeting for friendship and maybe something more

Fucks sake    

The Mrs has just told me the X Factors back on tonight & doesn't finish till Christmas!!
Hashtag Kill m

OH MY GOD
NAN JUST BROUGHT ME VIP TICKET FOR Bars and Melody IN MARGATE !
OH MY FUCKING GOD !!!!!

Why is it not until next year ?
I need it to be RIGHT NOW
I am actually going to see ‪Bars And Melody
I cannot wait      I’m actually shaking

Morrisons security guard sitting on a shoplifter - you are my Spirit Animal for today.

Kent braced for rain and thunderstorms as Met Office issues severe weather warning.

Last night I ate a Subway. Then 30 minutes later I bought chicken nuggets cos I forgot I’d already eaten  - and that pretty much sums up my life.

Kent Police
Please be considerate of pets on this Bonfire night
And enjoy the evening.

I think I’m going to just get into bed when I get home and watch telly.

There's a very eerie sea mist rolling across the clifftops this evening

You know what.   This is the place.   This is home.

Yes
People are pessimistic 
They’ve been let down so much in the past
They’re just waiting for it to all go wrong
They don’t trust the council
And for good reason
But even without that
Us Brits we look for anything to winge about 
People moan but noone wants to do anything about it
They’ll protest
That’s easy
But to actually do something to make things better…
People are too busy getting on with their own lives.
Apathy is a big part of the problem
And people find change difficult
They complain about things
But when you suggest change
They moan more
They want things how they used to be.
They’d rather have something familiar and shit
Than nice but different
Here - anything negative - people just jump on it 
They like to point out faults.
But things change
It’s not like they were ever really so good before
Hoardes of drunks invading the beach in the summer
Gangs fighting
People struggling to make ends meet in the winter
People look back on this kodachrome coloured past in the 60s
But the 60s here -
There was shit floating in the sea
But. 
We love that dreamland is back.

Yes.

Just a reminder that whilst you may not be on school grounds - if you
are wearing school uniform you are still representing the school.

I’m meant to be sleeping but instead I'm just laying here listening to the rain

I love this time of the year in Margate.
The only people around around are men with cans staring out to sea

Greggs start serving soup next week.
Hashtag.  Sick of sandwiches

When do the clocks go back ?

Next summer seems a long, long way away

Really should do my homework, but the Kardashians are looking very appealing

Having a lazy Saturday.
Curled up on sofa with dogs.
(Yawn....)

Excellent Ale and company tonight 
Well worth the wet n windy walk

Last night I dreamed I moisturised my arms.
Wild, wild life.


I love sitting here listening to the waves.
Better get moving though, as there's a storm a coming!

I love the rain, sitting here listening to it makes me excited for winter

Margate is beautiful even in the rain

A dark foreboding noise gradually turns into the sound of the lapping sea.
Louise gets a coat from her bag and puts it on Nigel. She gets out her own coat and puts it on. The new music starts.
The video slowly changes to a very dark stormy sky.
Light on Louise.

Louise :
All the lost balls from the summer
Are bobbing up and down in the harbour
Everything is grey
We are all tired
The seagulls just don’t give a shit

Nigel in falsetto:
the trees are empty
the streets are empty
bring everything in
wait
the world is shallow breathing

Louise :

I love this town in winter
When it’s ours.

Nigel with a Glasgow accent :

For me In my romantic, sort of idealized vision I like the peace and quiet of the winter
I used to walk along to the town and sometimes when the wind’s against you, you get back indoors and close the door and make a cup of tea, and that, you feel as if you’ve achieved something, just going out for a loaf and a box of teabags (laughs)
Ah. If only life was that simple
Music changes - darker.

A few police cars up my road… another normal day in Margate

Fuck. The Turner Centre.
They spent millions of pounds on that shitty fucking building/they talk about these fancy new shops but that was just like/ there’s one nice thing - and then there’s shithole right round the outside/cos this is Margate
You look at dreamland out the window and then you look at Arlington and you’re like /yeah you can just see Arlington house like urh/   That needs to get knocked down (laughs)
I don’t think that things are going to get better
NO/No

The Turner Contemporary 
That’s wasted money 
When so many other beautiful places have got dilapidated and places are closing 
Why THAT when they could have spent the money on something else  ?
Nobody asked us
It’s made no difference, that we’ve seen
People don’t come down this part of town
There’s still no shops in the high street
Lots of people say ‘I’ve been there once and that’s it - I won’t go again’ 
(won’t go again)
That’s the sort of attitude lots of people have had towards it.
You get lots of...
You see lots of...
Students
...going in there.
I don’t know that it’s brought money in
You don’t have to pay to go in there or anything
People come for the day, go there.. and to the beach
-both of them are free
Then go home before it gets dark
and we’re no better off
Turner
He wasn't even from here
He came down from London to see his mistress
He wasn't from here
We've spent all this money for a man who wasn't even from here
We don't need a gallery
We want our pier
And the sun deck back

Yeah
People don’t want that
They should have, like a Nike shop
If they was to have like a Nike shop and things like that, like a Gucci shop and like a Fendi shop and things like that, and not those vintage shops and stuff,  that’s not what we want
Outlet shops
That would bring the attraction - because there’s more like..otherwise you have to go to Ashford and, apart from that, you have to go to Wembley or to Westfields so...if they made an outlet clothes shop you wouldn’t have to go to…like Bluewater/Bluewater/..Like what they did in Canterbury - they should do that over here.
We need designer
Yeah
If they had like a JD or like an actual, like, Nike store or an actual Adidas store.. Gucci Fendi /where you walk in and it’s like ‘there’s the trainers’...AAH/ Louis Vuitton and things like that/  Like when you go to Nike Town there’s like - Floor. Floor. Floor. Trainers. Trainers. Trainers./yeah exactly - there’s like loads of trainers and they’re all AMAZING/ yeah.

We are very distressed that someone would think to steal from a hospice.
They were taken from the fundraising office which is at the back of the reception.
I have apologised to the family and reported the incident to the police but there is little they can do.

Anyone got a retail horror story ?
There’s always plenty in Margate!
One guy wanted nautical rope - 'To strangle some cunt '
Another one accused me of stalking him.

Love Margate, as always, love Thanet Council -
but parts of it definitely have a dog poo on pavements problem!

Don’t be surprised if you don’t meet Bars and Melody at Soccer Six.
In Margate they were 3 hours late and hardly met anyone.

Bars and Melody are charging fans £16 pounds for a retweet and £5000 to meet them.
I don’t understand.

Sorry Bars and Melody but I can’t afford that - and most others can’t - we love you and your music - we’re all just worried the fame will get to you.

Its stormy in Margate this morning. 
The seagulls are hunkering down

Today's sea…   Big brown and bouncy - just like me

Thanet Council- serious question:
Have you ever made a statement explaining exactly why you’re incapable of keeping Margate clean ?

I work all the time and I’m still in debt.

Yes
He’s got dementia 
My mums just worn out
He won’t leave her alone
I walk his dog every morning but here there’s always dogs attacking other people’s dogs here
Everyone’s nervous
Dogs seem to pick on him
They know he’s scared
He’s got to the stage that he doesn’t want to go out
He’s wondering who’s going to attack him next

We love Margate
We love where we live.

Same again?  It’s my round
I’ve got work tomorrow !
I’VE got work tomorrow !!

A White Man who doesn't stand up for his own race can't really be considered a man at all.

Why aren't I drunk?

Last night was absolutely mental !

I’m looking particularly fantastic tonight

I live in Broadstairs and I must say what a shit hole Margate is.
I don’t think many people will want to go on holiday to see a lot of asylum seekers and wogs 
So, come to Broadstairs  
We don’t have many here

JUST TO LET EVERYONE IN MARGATE KNOW THERE IS A MUCH BETTER LIFE OUTSIDE OF THANET, SOME OF YOU SHOULD TRY IT SOMETIME.
THEN YOU'LL REALISE WHAT YOU'VE BEEN MISSING AND YOU'LL NEVER WANT TO GO OUT IN THANET AGAIN.
MY ADVICE TO YOU IS, GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN, START RUNNING AND DON'T LOOK BACK, BECAUSE THERE IS A WORLD OUT THERE THAT WILL AMUSE AND AMAZE
AND ALL OF YOU CONTENT WITH GOING TO THE SAME OLD CRUDDY PUB WEEK IN, WEEK OUT - GET A LIFE AND START LIVING IT!!!
THE WORLD IS AN AMAZING PLACE

The news : Rich people, paying rich people, to tell middle class people, to blame poor people.

Remind me whose country this is again ?

Call me old fashioned but I have gone to bed with a glass of champagne and Strictly beckoning

Oh My God this place is stuffed full of vile, venom-spitting lefty socialists.....yuck

Erm why have I decided to watch this debate thing, I don't even understand it.
I hate politics

Shut-up I'm talking

My back pain is set on kill today
Also I want nachos

Got told to move away from Margate Mosque today - by the Boys in Blue.
So… it seems the Muzzies are offended by me saying Mohammed was a paedo.

I want pussy

Margate today - crazy waves, freezing winds and tiny persistent sandpipers.

He’s a western boy
He’s a western boy
And when you go back …they kill you
That’s what they do. They see you. They kill you. They know that you’ve been westernized
He’s 17 years old
They have been told to stop sending people back because we can’t guarantee their safety.
All of the promises they make of help when they get back -
All lies
They never do it. 
They take whatever they have straight off them.
Then they’re out on the street.
Those boys…
They’re dead within weeks.

Once upon a time a 13 year old could walk the streets without fear of being groomed or kidnapped… they let immigrants in ...THE END.

Christmas music has begun in the office. So much cheer

Remember when there used to be shops like Argos in Margate, where you could buy some FUCKING headphones.  I feel like my life is over.

There's washing absolutely everywhere and I just want to cry.

Nothing better than a dog in a Christmas jumper watching football.

Last night I dreamed I gave Rod Stewart a lift to Margate in my van.
Best dream I’ve had in ages

Change of lights.  Sleigh bells.  Christmas music

MInce pie anyone ?

17 for dinner at our place today - and I’ve got to say the kids did us really proud. So well behaved. Well done Sandy. The food was outstanding.

Well I had a quiet, but beautiful, Christmas Day.
Woke up to see the sun gleaming over the ocean.
Love Margate,
Love my man.
Blessed.

Lights change back. Music starts again hard

No mate. 
I’m not going on the beach
I’m not fucking up my trainers
They’re new

I am so looking forward to what the New Year brings

Why am I awake ?

We are looking for a woman aged 35+ who used to be overweight and on disability living allowance, due to weight related issues, but is now a healthy weight and employed 
We’d like her to agree with the idea that overweight people SHOULD lose their benefits if they refuse treatment on the NHS.
We’d want her to talk about how having her benefits taken away would have given her the motivation to lose weight and how great she feels now that she’s thin and supporting herself.

Dear Margate  - the shit cunt who stole the six quid mp3 player from my car last night - I hope you learn to love the Sweet Hammond Organ.

A householder's been stabbed in the face at his home in Margate after four masked intruders broke in.

Man left with broken jaw after cashpoint attack in Margate

Oh wow !  So when a school becomes an academy their title deeds and land are transferred to a private company..

My parents are smoking all my fags

We need change.

People like the edgy feel of Margate,
The “real people” feel:
Rich people living cheek by jowl with poor people.
Parts of London feel so safe and mundane now.

Music builds

For me the arcades have a dark seediness to them…The arcades are a magnet for kids and, and…other shit. And in seaside towns the kids that don’t go to school gravitate to these sort of places. And that’s when you get all this ...other stuff that goes on… and for me…  that dark side of Margate... I’ve got ..I find quite depressing, you know what I mean.  It is quite seedy
And people have to pick up the pieces from what goes on there…   people whose job is to look after those kids…  and there’s not enough staff to manage them all as they should – all the kids sent down from London boroughs - kids in care - vulnerable young migrants who arrive here without families.   If they wiped out the arcades completely I’d be quite happy, to be quite honest with you…the people on the sexual offenders register… all those dark characters have always centred around that part of the town.
But
Margate’s definitely on the way up  
Definitely
It’s a long way off but you can see it happening.
Up to very recently it was a kind of Third World Hell.

Ah Margate...   so many memories

Me and the cat are no longer friends

Oh my god let’s eat this !!!!!

I’ll be glad when the tag comes off and I can get out and about again - freedom of movement restricted by freedom of speech.

Close our borders. Give British jobs for British people. and give British homes for British people. It’s the only way to safeguard our future generatio

Immigrants to England get better treatment than the English do.
Feeling second class in my own country.
It isn’t right.

In need of a naughty girl

To all the whining leftists: It's obvious why our ancestors left Africa.
Same reason locals have left Barking - Can't stand the neighbours.

Morning beautiful people
Has anyone been dogging?

I don’t have a car.  I don’t have a smart phone.  I buy my clothes from the charity shop. We can’t afford to have the heating on.. or eat meat… or go abroad.
So it’s not us that’s killing the planet

I fully fear the group chat sumtimes

I Just Found a man undressed, outside, screaming in agony for an ambulance.
I rang 999 – They refused to come.
I didn't even know that was possible.
I’m Shocked.

A car just drove down the parade, windows down, shouting 'nigger' at black people.
Something has made racism open here suddenly.

Whoops !
Should have kept that one in the friend zone

Everyone thinks that we are a nasty little racist backwater.
Hoping all the decent people can turn that around.

Well make some positive suggestions then.
I'm a Ukipper, and - like you-  I just want what's best for Margate.

My recycling was collected this morning on its scheduled day for the first time
in 6 weeks.
Seriously though... shouldn't be that difficult.

Now, Margate is not the place for Grindr. Eeh !

Walking back up the Northdown Road it’s easy to forget the sea is there.
Must remember to go the longer way sometimes

Pound planet.  How is it possible to have so many things for a pound ?!

What on earth has happened to my life??
Not sleeping because I'm worried about the bloody bins & whether they'll be collected!

All I think about all the time is money
Every decision I make in the day - I think about money
I go to bed at night I think about money
I dream about money

At least life wants to fuck me

It’s February.  Why is it so warm ?

It’s tourists and foreigners who have ruined this town.

I seem to have found myself on an anti-racism march.
I only went out for a paper.

The neighbours I don't know any of them  
Most of them don't speak English
The Roma get beaten up because they get mistaken for Pakis
The Czecks sympathise with ukip because they hate the Romas.
I don’t go out after dark any more.

It’s not all about Money. Work. Benefits. Justice
It’s about Believing in Something, Knowing who we are - and Fairness.

Shit … when’s my wedding anniversary

ooh ello

brap brap brap

And so capitalism reaches its final stage – selling any old shit as the world burns.

Glasgow accent
Yeah.  Margate its always been a bit right wing and I don’t like that about it.  
But there is a lot of good people.
There’s a lot of tortured people - you know … directionless 
Kind of rudderless you know
Late 98 - when the first big wave of asylum seekers were coming here from whatever African country was in conflict at the time -  they were in the big hotel - the Nayland Rock where Mick Jagger and Jerry fucking Hall had their wedding reception.   
That was full of people from an African county  - I don’t remember which one, but they had to get out or risk all manner of god knows what horror.
And I remember standing and watching grown men, grown men, screaming
bile and vitriol up at the windows - and these bemused people looking at them wondering what they were talking about.
I always remember the faces of the children you know.
They’re fucking scumbags man  (laughs) 
Just scumbags   scumbags
Just jealous, horrible, vitriolic little scumbags

I have never regretted moving here for one minute of one day.

Should there be daffodils in winter ?

Things are getting better.

Margate.
This is a dumping ground for London 
children especially
children   
the biggest bill that the council has got is for the children
Because they dump their children  
the children 
The asylum seekers children 
They bring them over with them 
Then they leave them 
They’re abandoned  
The authorities have to look after them   
Then after 18 - they get so much money after that 
You tell me that’s right 
But my niece’s boyfriend - 17 
Can’t get a job 
Can’t sign on because he’s not 18
Just can’t get a job  
Where did it all go ? 
Where did our national heath go ?
I paid in all my life, right  
Where is all the money that I paid in gone ?
Where is it gone ?  We’re in debt    Do you know why it is ?  
Where’s all the money gone ? 
Where’s all the money gone that we paid in

It's our England
We are proud of our country

I am an English man

I am an English man

I am an English man

I am an English man

I am an English man

I love it here
This is my home

I thought we had done all this
And here we are again

Do not speak for me 

Obviously, you’re a bit slow on the uptake.
I'll spell it out
I Don't give a fuck, what you think
Got it!?

Yep - if you can't win the argument using, you know, facts - you only really have shouting left

Why don’t you just SHUTUP

DO not SPEAK FOR ME

This is my home

Things are getting better

Hope is coming

Dreamland is back

Music stops  Lights drop   the sky changes
The sound of people talking in different languages. Nigel and Louise take off their coats.   Lights come on Nigel.

Nigel in Falsetto smiling :

The people are coming

the voices slowly fade

Every one of you

Every one of you

Dreamland

Lights on Louise

Louise :

The heartbeat of the sea
The veins of the planes through the sky
We are building walls
We are pulling down walls
And building walls

Our home
Our town
Where we live out our lives as best we can
On this island
With these people
In this spinning world

Spring is here

The birds are returning

There is cherry blossom on the evenly spaced trees along the long road back into town
Mock Tudor houses with gravelled pathways
Balconies -  you can sit and watch the cars hurtle by
They came out of the choking filth and the soot of the city.
To breathe the sea air.

Music starts

We’re down at the beach-hut with the cordless drill.
Putting the crocks and the jelly shoes - now one size up - into the rack
Hammering the wind break with both hands on the mallet
The tea is on
The empty lifeguard station is overrun by gulls
The percussive ropes of the empty flag pole  
Neither yellow nor red today
The grandchildren jumping up and down - pony tails like pony’s tails bobbing

Put your coat on

Nigel : I'm not cold

It's simple
It costs nothing
Maybe the price of an ice cream

She’s sitting in the beach hut where she can read the paper out of the wind
The steady rumble of the traffic is drowning out the rumble of the waves down the beach

Nigel eats chips out of paper as he listens

If it wasn't for the wind it would be quite warm

Your Hair is tacky in the salt air

You look back at the town 
Gaudy
Grubby
Bloated with nostalgia 
I’ll see you in a couple of hours probably
In the pub

They walk along the beach talking, not talking  
The sand is hard and wrinkled underfoot 

Splinters of new razor sharp glass - clear and pale brown - among the shells and shingle at the water’s edge 
Blunted pebbles of old glass - pale blue and milky white, deep green and chocolate
Harris fencing round the shelter they are desperate to knock down, with a nod to keeping children out of danger
A Woman has her shoes off on the pavement by the office -
Nosebleed
A Man - crouched down beside her with a First Aid kit he can't get open.
Aware that his T shirt says ‘Kiss Me Quick’
‘Scream if you want to go faster’

In the pub
The ripple of lights from the slot machines
Flags of St George
Motionless fans over the too bright lights
“Place your food order here” hanging in meaningless space over nowhere
The sound of pool balls clacking 
Everyone moaning about the Landlord who’s asleep upstairs
A song about money and all the honeys and the Kristal

“Beware of the wife. Dog ok”

The Barmaid says goodbye to everyone by name.
To the strangers – “I’ll see you again

She’s happy. She knows she’s done her job well.

The man thinks  -  This is what life is.  
We’ve all got one stab at this.
He doesn’t think  “Why me ?”

You walk past a woman in a fur hat and stack heels, already very pissed -  long hair caught in her mouth.  

I am standing at the bar with your drink already poured 

I have a feeling that, with you, it's always going to be a sunny day.

Nigel : we are back from the dead motherfuckers

Sound starts to build

People are starting to care what it looks like here.
They are jet spraying the filth from the pebble dash
People are starting to listen and to care
Not about the people - but the place itself
People are coming here with dreams and plans.
On purpose.
People are noticing the sea and the sky again  

I want it to be summer and I want to be on the beach and I wanna be with my best friends and I want to have no responsibilities

I’m thinking about moving to Margate

You could move to Margate, where property is very cheap and the beach is enormous

We’re just looking for a better life

I’m kind of in love with Margate. I viewed some flats there this week.
It is seriously Dreamy McDream.

Ok - Margate is actually really beautiful and we feel kind of bad that we have been so mean about it …   We are thinking we might actually move here

A customer asked today…  So why Margate ?
…Well - take a seat madam and let me enlighten you

We came here to find a house we could renovate and turn into a showcase for our talents. It just seemed like there was so much going on here; the creative energy and exciting atmosphere made the place feel so alive, but on a scale that we could engage with.
We thought 'this is where we need to be right now, for work and for us';
we could be part of what was going on down here.

Give it another 10 years and it will be a very different place
The private houses - they’re all being bought and done up
The houses here … (gestures)
They're all council/housing association…
That’s why it’s so shabby
So we need to move them out
When you’re up next week - make sure you do your research- find out who your neighbours are before you think of buying anywhere

The thing is - the essentials of life are harder to find than ever: a good life and an honest place; a solid, modest home, big enough to house a small family in a peaceful, orderly landscape; good local schools - open to all who need them; reasonably paid secure work for this generation and the next; competent government and wise laws.
These have become luxuries, unattainable for millions who once took them for granted.

Seeing Dreamland is back has prompted me to dig out a rare photo of me, upside down on acid, next to a man with metal hands.

Margate, England
Sunny.
Cloudless skies.
Five Royal Navy Boats are manoevering in the mouth of the Thames Estuary

A beautiful, golden light shines on Dreamland
Out in the estuary the Royal Navy sit 
Waiting.   Watching.  Guarding.

Tomorrow is the beginning of our new adventure together


My advice to you -  buy while you still can.

Are you getting enough rent ?
With property prices finally starting to move in the area - it is highly likely that your property is due a rent increase.
How do you get more rent ?
…Call us and talk

I got sick of having the same conversation with everyone…
“We’ve got no money. We’ve got no time.”
I came because there is space for me here.
Space for my little life - some space left at the end of every working day to actually do things, see friends…  think.
I just needed to get away from the Arseholes Paradise that London is fast becoming.

3 Days away from Margate - amazing how much you miss the sea, sand & the whole buzz of a town re-generating !!!

Can we just go back to last Thursday, please, when all this bombs and killing hadn’t started yet.

Have you seen how many Sold signs there are around Margate  
I’ve never seen anything like it

Property Management Apprentice needed in ‪Margate
Apply now.

So the 99p Store in Margate has been replaced by a Poundland -
most comical form of gentrification I’ve ever seen !

How can Margate be so pretty and such a shithole at the same time

While the old town is thriving 
The high street is dead 
We don’t need loose leaf tea !
- although it’s very nice for them.
We need Marks and Spencers
We need a butchers
We need shoes
I want to try them on
I don’t want to buy them on the internet and I haven’t got a car to go to Westwood Cross.

Margate – I was worried about it becoming a hipster dystopia, but I’m relieved to see it's still endearingly shit

The main trouble with this regeneration is - or gentrification - or whatever you want to call it  ….its bringing all the gays here.

You can spin it,
paint it,
rebrand it,
upcycle it,
put flower pots along the roads,
open a fucking oyster bar     
- But people have eyes

Basically it’s a shit hole, but there’s nice things if you’ve got the money.  
The people who used to point out its ugliness, no longer focus on those things... because they have a vested interest in distracting attention away from the reality - to the new branding -  the new narrative.

An independent report into the running of Dreamland has revealed a series of serious concerns

I guess it all comes down to what do you choose to see or not to see  - the shit on the beach.  Or the beach.

“All aboard the Art Wanker Express"
-driving down the street shouting at the hipsters  
“who are you ?” 
“who the fuck are you ?

Margate. It's not exactly moving to Berlin.

My dad is absolutely obsessed with me moving to Margate after
mentioning it ONCE.

Now it's filled with cunts on penny farthings with moustaches

I do go to exhibitions locally but I hate private views.
I did go to one here but no one seemed interested in the art.
They were just talking about property prices

Well. All that Effing and Jeffing. I don’t call that art

This is just the first wave.    Before we all get priced out

I completely fell back in love with Margate this weekend – you know what  - it the Best Place on the Planet.

Look. 
How many people actually buy a house anywhere with the intention of "supporting the local community"

People are getting brushed aside as if their lives were nothing.  
As if they were not relevant to the town or to society.
These people aren’t going to go away
They’re just going to get moved around the coastline 
And then that area will get regenerated.
And then they’ll get moved somewhere else  

Well London.  
The whole fucking country hates London.

My mother never went to London in her life and it’s just 70 miles away 
She never needed to 
She never missed it  
She had all she wanted here

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO COME BACK HERE - to this petty minded, bigoted, infighting backwater. I moved out to get away from this.

I was just walking down the road and someone called me a poofter !
…It’s so retro here !

I just want a normal life.

Now is an interesting time for young people… as most of us start to realise we will never be able to afford to live in big cities.

I actually dream of having my own kitchen one day… always clean.
With a luxurious herb ‘n spice cupboard…

This is the home I have always dreamed of.

Come to Margate  
Live like Kings!

Look - Margate isn't the new Shoreditch, Dalston or Brighton.
It is, and always will be, our own beautiful Margate, in our own beautiful England

Music changes,  lights change,  seagulls.  video changes to abstract pink clouds   Louise and Nigel take off their jumpers.


Louise :

June 20st  10.34 pm

The sun pauses on the horizon
There is a strawberry moon
Summer is here

Music changes  Video changes to abstract black clouds

Louise :

June 24th

We have woken up this morning in the same, but a different place

Nigel : 
What to expect – the rain will be followed by heatwave spikes throughout the summer.

What to expect – lightning, floods, hail and downpours

Louise :

Good lord woman !
Everything is changing and there's nothing i can do


Sudden change. Colouful swirling clouds and arcade type music

Louise :

July 22nd

It’s the last day of school    
We’re going to do a lot of playing today.
All the teachers will be smiling.
We can talk about what we’re going to do in the really, really long holiday.
Then we have the holiday

Arcade music steps up,  lights dip,  video transforms to colourful dripping.  
Nigel and Louise dance with fingers crossed

please don’t rain,  please don’t rain

please don’t rain, please don’t rain

please don’t rain

please don’t rain

please don’t rain, please don’t rain

please don’t rain, please don’t rain, please don’t rain, please don’t rain, please don’t rain

The arcade music stops, the lights change to warm light, blue sky projected.

Louise :

July 23rd

The first day of the holidays

3.33 am  Clear skies. Light rain.  

9.30 am … The sun is shining and all will be well !

Droning sound

Let’s all go on holiday at home this year  
And support our local resorts
The weather seems to be getting better year on year 
There’s no lifejackets piled up on the beaches - or refugee camps
And you don’t have to worry about getting shot or having your kid’s heads chopped off

Why do we need to go abroad ?
We can all go on holiday like we used to in the old days

I miss the old days.

Yeah !!!!  
BEACH BEACH BEACH BEACH BEACHHHHHHHHHHH
!!!

Margate is packed already..   Holy Shit !

I have never seen Margate so busy

The only words I’ve heard today are… Margate. Beach and Packed.

I wonder how many people will go sick today

Here we all are :
From all walks of life,
From all over the world
With our trousers rolled up,
Paddling,
Eating ice cream,
Watching the sun set.

Why did we stop coming here ?

That was so nice Jean !
Next time we come we'll have some… erm….Prawns !

…Oooh

music changes

Hello Bryan
How are things in sunny Margate England ?
It is VERY hot here in Margate Florida !!!!
Thank you for your funny card …
...We have to say that anyone that Donald Trump hates - deserves it.
Isn't it interesting to watch the protesters at his rallies? 
They are the scum of the earth. 
Our country now has more TAKERS than MAKERS,
more TRASH than CLASS
and more JERKERS than WORKERS.
Ron and I are stocking up on ammo. 
Will be getting a permit next week to carry a concealed weapon. 
Can't believe times have come to this but we must protect our lives and freedom.
There is no doubt whatsoever that the muslims are intentionally destroying America!!!
And they’re doing a good job!!
Hope you and Betty are doing well. 
How does it feel to have your country back ?
All the best,
Sara

Health experts issue Heatwave Alert as temperature looks set to hit 35 degrees in Kent

You rang…
Utang

I love this country, but never have I been so scared about it.
The growing bitterness, resentment and hatred is genuinely frightening.


I struggle to sleep after arguing with you

The body of a man has been washed up on Margate Sands

We got out just in time
They burnt down our house
That my father built
The neighbours, they were wearing our clothes  
- the people I grew up with.
They said it would take a couple of weeks to process our claim.  
I rented a thousand pound a week flat on the Edgeware Road
I thought, in a couple of weeks I can get a job and pay the rent.    
Eight months later we had run out of money.  
We contacted the authorities  
They sent a van for us  
There were other families  
They brought us here  
I am not allowed to work  
We get £5 a day to live on  
I find even that humiliating  
I try to do something every day to earn it
I work at the food bank
At the care homes
I read to the old people
I have been here 18 months  
I don’t know how much longer before I get an answer
I won’t have my picture taken or go on social media
Isis - if they see someone is here - they assume you have money.
So they kidnap your family members still at home.
When Saddam was alive at least we were all persecuted indiscriminately
Now we have turned on each other….
The Americans
They destroyed everything
They left nothing behind
We used to be self sufficient -
manufacture everything we needed
But that has all gone
Now we have to import everything from America.
We are now just consumers.
Noone used to care if you were Sunni or Shea
Now people you have seen every day of your life and said good morning to.
Now your neighbours
They want you dead.

Come join us for lunch or dinner. We are supping crisp La Roche Chenin, with seabass ceviche in the Carribean heat in Margate

Russian tycoon’s 225 million pound - bombproof – superyacht, is now anchored in the waters off Margate

A warning has been issued over the “long term viability” of Dreamland after its accounts revealed a significant overspend.

One thing is definite - we don’t really know what’s going to happen over the coming years, and solid ground suddenly feels a bit shaky. 
For us poor, much maligned, Interior Designers - this has meant projects scaled back - or even cancelled altogether. 
But you can take comfort in small domestic tasks…
These we can control.
I got great satisfaction yesterday from wire brushing my stone window lintels.

When I was looking at this sky I was thinking of you and dreaming.  
Excited !
Bring on the playgrounds and the battlegrounds

It’s all going to be ok

Are people going to help us no.  
It's not going to be ok.
If you haven't got a pension you are in trouble.
If you don’t own a house you are in trouble 
if you are ill you are in trouble 
if you get made redundant you are fucked.

It’s not the poor foreigners who live here we should be worrying about …
We are Flogging off large swathes of the country to foreign investors
We don’t own our country any more 
We have to rent it back from the people we sold it to - at extortionate prices.
We have been bought to let
For cash…
The whole country

And what do we do when we have sold everything and the debt is too big to be paid…..  What will they ask of us next ?


This idea that we will always sit at the top table is a delusion.
Our great grandchildren will be the next global wage slaves and sweatshop fodder.
Slum dwellers  
Street children.
Rubbish pickers.
Sex workers 

All those people living on a pound a week so we can have cheap things…
Now we will be living on a pound a week so they can have cheap things
And they won't think twice about us either

The rich...
They are taking over the cities
They are building the Arc.

We live in our parents’ house.
And we will now live in our parents’ house forever
They are shaping our world in the image of their imagined past
While our whole country becomes a Heritage Theme Park 
Now every town will be a retirement village 
And the only jobs left will be carers and undertakers  
The young are the minority  
We will always be the minority now  
It’s only the foreigners who were making up the numbers
Now our only future will be serving the old...
While the world moves on without us

I feel happy. It’s a different kind of feeling.  I haven’t felt it for a while.

I made the mistake of getting in the shower and now all the news has changed again !


A spokesman for Thanet District Council said:
“We are happy with the way it is going at Dreamland …and confident for the future”

Talking with Margate residents this week, I was asked … “What are the main issues people write to me about”
Well.…I’m sorry to disappoint all the people concerned about -
Live animal exports, the NHS cuts, jobs, schooling, elderly services, cuts
in policing and fire servic 
Right now, top of the list is… Street cleaning. 
Rapidly followed by… Parking, Grass cutting, Roadworks, Parks Maintenance, and… Anti-Social Neighbour issues.

Someone is actually listening at last

Temperatures in Thanet approaching 40 degrees …
Please be careful, cover up …and keep indoors if you can

No man, fuck, Margate is too hot today.
Just came indoors  - the sun is doing my head in. 

Wow. Too. Hot. To. Do. Anything.

I have a very bad feeling about all this.

Cheese is good. I love cheese. All kinds. It doesn't matter what type.
Cheese does the job.

Look at that sunset, Kev   
You could be anywhere in the world, but you can’t beat this.

It’s the feeling we can’t do anything about it all that’s most painful

Waaaaah. You are like little baby

Oh go away you pathetic little man. Your dreams are mist.

Tell me what you really think, tho



Did you know that if you hold a person underwater for long enough they stop being a Fucking Cunt.

I love that the joke shop in Margate is open before 9.30am on a Sunday.
For all your early morning comedy needs.

The people of Margate are proper people
They are patriotic and they care about Britain
The people here do not think of themselves as European people, Western people, People of the world.
They think of themselves as Kent people, Thanet people,
Margate people.

My passions…
Family,
Rugby,
Dreamland,
Life
and this wonderful place called Home

See you at Dreamland



Nigel

We Got to Unwind in life nowdays, or try to in UK.
A Lot Of Heartless People out there in the UK now
It is a Crazy life out there in the UK NOW
People need to Stop Snorting the Cocaine and all the other Bad Drugs out there on the Streets
So be careful if you are out and talk to in life
Keep away from the scum in life

Hope the Gate win tonight not the Reds at Ramsgate
Here a lot of Bad and Mad people out there in life and who Steal things out there in life, for there Drugs in life
Male & female
All ages in life

Watch out for the dark nights now, in life. More scum will be out on the streets.
Always be care full in life if your partner or friend or family friend or family don’t pay there way in life, when they living with.
Don’t let them use you in life, got to trust them in life, as well in life.
The Gov in UK got to sort out the Drug Dealers & the Drug Takers in life & the People are Scum in life.
The Gov got to sort out in life - who Use people & who Steal in life & who want FREE every thing in life.
We are all not scum in life, in UK or out side UK.
Say to them well done.
People who run this Country don’t no how to run this Country in life.
The Gov got to Stop letting people coming over to UK for a better life for them in life, they are taking our Housing & our Jobs.
Looks like we have given away our Country, now we are taking it back in life.
What is your best Colour in life ?
We dont like Pink or Black.

So the Gov and Thanet district council got to get together on this matter, we need more bus service - Thanet loop.
All over Thanet need the Service.
We can’t stand people going on about Benefit Cuts in life in the UK, then the Govt have to get them in a well Payed Jobs in life.
So they can pay a stamp, for lot of people have not Payed into the UK YET.
The Gov got to Stop the people coming over here now & living on Benefit life & Scum life, for years in life.
We can’t stand People who don’t want to Speak or Prove the Truth in life or don’t speak much in life, in the UK or out side the UK.
When they walking around the shit streets, in there shit life, they don’t want to change - 24/7.

My Arams hurt and my Shoulds hurt tonight and my Hips.
My Mum & Dad are Stress out about what that Steven Babineaux done to me & he never payed his way to me, as in life & his street life.
My Mum & Dad don’t want to know Steven Babineaux because his lies, & what he did to me in life, for rest of my life now in life
I can’t get on with life much now days, until he or his family or his scumfriends pay me bk in life.
Every one nos - my family and friends, my ex friends and my new friends -nos he unloved me in life, as a Lover in life - he nos that.
They no I had an unhappy ending relationship with a person who done me down & took me for my money I once had in life.
My family said ‘Nothing is not for Nothing in life’
And he still walks Margate streets by not paying me bk my money and get my goods bk in life.
Nigel takes off his shirt
The Gov got to sort out all these people going around in life abusing & stealing & Metal illness for people taking drug life.
The Gov got to Burn all these Scum Bags of the Streets in life, who make our Streets a Mess in life in the UK - Day & Nights
The Gov got to Stop all this Bulling in life, in Doors & out Doors in life.
Just be care full who u go home with and who u let to sleepover in life.
And be care full who you full in love with in life, straight or gay or bi-ways in life.
We can’t stand how people bring there children up now days in life & the way they act away from Mum & Dad in life.
Every one in life has Benefit Money or Work or Both Coming in life, they just have to Cope with life, not be Scum - what we don’t like.
There No Happiness in the UK now in life because the Gov & the Scum People we have in the UK & OUT SIDE THE UK IN LIFE, all types.

Time means time in life.
These are not like the Days when my Family use to take me & my Brother down to the beach, when our Mum & Dad was younger in life
I am Suffering from lot of things in life, because of my ex who made up he loved me in life, to himself & to me & to every 1 else who nos him in life, my family don’t want to no him.
Because what he is & what he did to me & for his lies 24/ 7 in life & for what he used me in life & stole of me & stole my things inside my flat & of me

So, Order your Free Reusable seagull proof bag

Put the Right Recycling things in them, Free to your front door, give the council them your address, then they get the Bags to your front door before u get FIND.

We want Clean Streets, Clean People in the UK

People in Thanet put wrong things in the Bins, so that wasting money away - to get people to sort all that out in life.

People in Thanet Borough are to Lazy to pick up, to get free Delivery of reusable seagull proof bag 2 there door.

Margate is the best Iceland to go to, the people who don’t live far from it - spend over £25 get a Free Home Delivery, where ever people live in the uk.

Iceland 4 toilet Rolls are better then the 99p store & Poundstretcher at Westwood shops ONES

Iceland Fresh Crumpets are nice

Iceland Frozen Ham & Cheese Panini are nice, 2 Mins in the Microwave

Iceland Mini Cream Biscuits are nice, only a £1 - all Diff Kinds in a Small Packet. Diff Flavours in the Packet

The Best Iceland Shops to go to are Margate and Ramsgate.
Bigger the shops the better for us.

The Thanet Work People getting pissed off with it all, with the Tenants with there bin rubbish in life.

When are Thanet Tenants going to get there Reusable seagull proof bags - Bags for there Waist Food Bags in life?

The sky projection has a huge white sun appear in the middle

Wake up  !!!

Wake up  !!!

The skys are burning
The leaves are burning

The sun projection turns red

The trees are burning
The bonfires choking
The water is rising
The people are blazing
The people are ablaze

I never stopped loving you 

I never stopped loving you

THE SUN IS GOD

STROBE

The image of the sun that is projected becomes negative

Nigel and Louise leave

AK/DK play on